Sunday, 30 June 2013

I Was Moved By Your Screen Dream

     The digital world won't help you cope with the real one.I finished a story that I've been writing since last February. It ended in only 13 pages, but I'm so happy that I finished it. When you start the story you don't know how it is going to end. So, I didn't know how it was going to end and I was keen on finding out. The best thing is when you build up your main characters' lives. I always have one character who has my opinions and beliefs (and off course many times my own problems), but this time I focused more on the mad side of people.
     My main problem was insomnia. And Clocks. I really need some sleep and I tried to deal with it the way my main character did. It really helps if you have someone who has the same problem. In order to find a solution, you both try many things and the one who succeeds first will help the other. Music is my solution. And I fall asleep. At 5 o'clock in the morning. It's still something.

Friday, 28 June 2013

I Don't Wanna Be Your Friend, I Just Wanna Be Your Lover

     The worst place you can get stuck is the 'Friend Zone' where everything happens fast, you got nothing to say, but it's OK. And sometimes it's really OK, listening to the one you love. Even if she thinks her boyfriend is better. Off course people fall in love and choose the people that they think they deserve. You only get what you think you deserve. Really ironic. I've been stuck on this dream for like a year.
     I'm drawing again. There was some inspiration for me. Nothing really happened, but with good mood, a glass of cold water, a pencil and a paper (and off course the CD Player shouting on the corner of my room!) it felt great. I'm happy these days. It even rained in the summer and I really love rain. I slept for many hours and I went for many walks. Nice days.
     This is the fierce last stand of all I am.

Tuesday, 25 June 2013

A Dreaded Sunny Day So We Can Go Where We Want

     It is really boring listening to people when they have nothing to say. And it's even more boring listening to people who talk, but with other's words. It's like talking to a Quote Book. So. I went out in the city for a walk. Everybody's happy and everybody hates the heat but adores the sunny days that have found us. It's clearly going to be an interesting summer. With all the promising conversations and all.
     It's still quiet in the nights. I can't even whisper. Not really good times for Whi.Co. That's right. Everyone's asleep. Can somebody sing me to sleep? Amazing song. It is perfect for the night playlists.

Sunday, 16 June 2013

Sociability Is Odd Enough For Me

    Last night, I had a dream. I think I was in the city hospital, in a coma. And I was aware that I was in a hospital bed, but I couldn't move my head to see. And there were people and flowers and I didn't want to be there.
    Well, I really want to be with people, I don't want to seem green and lonely, but when I'm with them I want to crawl under a rock and be by myself. I can't stand the conversations. It feels like they all want to tell me what to do. Like they want only their opinion to be heard. And I can't stand phoney people and people who lie. I can't stand them and they're everywhere. I meet them wherever I go.
     I can't take it anymore.

Saturday, 15 June 2013

Pull Me Out

     I feel my luck could change. At last my summer holidays start. It's an amazing feeling. Now, clearly, every day is like Sunday. Every day is dull. But I don't care. I feel like slowing everything down. And I rearranged everything in my bedroom. Now it's allright.
     The thing is that when summer comes and you have some time to spare at last you can relax and do whatever you want to. Time to brush the cobwebs out of the sky.

Saturday, 8 June 2013

I'm Just A Killer For Your Love

     It is significant to choose. But I never know if my choices were wrong or right. It's this point when you ask yourself: Is this where I'm going to? And you're stuck in a state of mind where everything finally seems wrong.
     Two days ago there was some driving rain. And I had to walk for twenty minutes in the rain. It felt like I was high. An amazing feeling. All my thoughts washed away. Even doubts and concerns. My clothes got really wet. Even my socks. The only thing that crossed my mind was this:

     Where am I going to?
     We'll see...

Wednesday, 5 June 2013

The Universe In A Basement

     I found some cassettes and VHS in a box and I listened to some almost muted alternative indie from the early '90s and watched some discoloured movies on the video. It was nice. Sitting there in your couch, comfortable.
     I've been watching a lot of movies lately. Sometimes two a day. It's my way of staying calm. And there aren't many things to do, you know. The choices are only a few. The most boring. Some ridiculously impossible. And they won't happen.

I don't know why I feel so tongue-tied. 
I don't know why I feel so skinned-alive.

Tuesday, 4 June 2013

Up Off The Westway

     It has been a while. I didn't have free time. I'm tired and bored. The last days were just dull and nothing happened. It's just like I'm stuck in a routine. The sky however is blue again. It's a very positive feeling. Even I like it. It gives me a sense of well being.
     At last I rearranged my library. All of the books and CDs fell into place. I threw some of them in the garbage. There were some of my old papers. The ones that had things I wrote three or four years ago. It's kinda embarrasing reading those lines and seeing those drawings.
     Come on. Get through it.